Worst day: let’s not think about the worst day. Let’s think
about waiting for the bus in sub zero temperatures and stomping your feet and
dropping coins in the snow and wondering why you are doing this when you could
still be under the blankets, curled up in dreams? And then the bus arrives and
you sit down, frozen fingers tingling back to feeling, and you think of the
little boys you waved good-bye to as you ran out the door. How once again love
saved you from despair. How you could be a drunk under a bridge or a pile of
ashes thrown to the wind but you had those babies to think about, the
grandsons, new life. How the little one throws his arms around
you and says I love you. And that makes the grief, the bankruptcy, the arguments,
the disappointments, the months when you had no home to be embraced and sheltered within,
all recede into the past. And you remove your wool beret and run your fingers through
your graying hair and think how it could have been cancer like your good friend,
dead one month after diagnosis, or it could have been HIV like a man you love, or it could have been the fibromyalgia that plagues a writer you
know who can never take a step without planning for ways to reduce the pain.
And so you tap your feet in your red suede boots that you bought last minute, thank God, and don’t think about the worst. You think about poems on the
computer waiting to be printed and the writing group where you’ll drink free coffee
and sit around a warm table, free to be yourself, free to praise the snow.
Thursday, September 25, 2014
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)